A lesson from the children

Reading has been a part of my life, the joy of which is not describable by words. There is one book which inspires me a lot, called ‘Tuesdays with Morrie’. It tells a story between a student and his dying professor, in which a lot of meaningful lessons from life were being taught again.

We, adults, probably would have never thought that we can learn from children. Yet my short encounter with children at school does tell me that you can!

Think we may not realize how many qualities of ours slip by as we grow up due to a number of reasons. Can you still remember the time when you were a kid, being so carefree and so spontaneous? What happen with us, adults?

Children I have worked with show tremendous amount of energy. Whereas, we are always running out of energy. Their curiosity does not seem to end which really impresses me. One thing that we may not be aware of is that, it is curiosity that helps breed some of the greatest scientists of the world such as Einstein. Interestingly, children are extremely direct and spontaneous when it comes to talking. There were times when some of my students told me, ’Oh! Your necklace is beautiful.’ Or on another occasion, they loved to complement me the way I looked or simply told me that they loved learning English. What can be better than receiving complements from children?!

Children just dare to show their real selves. They are who they are though at times, they are really away from being called innocent nor naive from the way they talk or interact with their peers. A good example was a case where some kids tried to isolate this one kid (sadly, he did not look like a smart kid by appearance though it did not mean that he was not good anything) who did not have the proper social skills. I then asked them why they did that. They simply told me that that one kid was not as “clever” as they were. I was totally shocked. I could not help telling them that how clever they thought they were.

Luckily, my experience with people is so far quite smooth. I am happy to have met a lot of great people along my life, wherever they are though at times, you meet superficial people. That’s life!

Working with children also taught me the importance of listening. A lot of times, we love to talk plus we have so much to talk about, or to complain about. It is hard to be a good listener though I am learning to be one. I remember when I first started teaching, I was always thinking of what to teach and how to teach it. Then, through one conversation with a great colleague of mine, we realized if we ever truly listened carefully. It made a whole lot of difference when you really listened and understood your audiences, who in this case, were the children. Listening, I must say, matters as much as talking. If you never listen, how can you even carry on the conversation with the others. This is just so useful to every part of our life.

Children have a strong zest for learning. Their passion is so intense that sometimes, as a teacher, I may not know very well how to deal with it. They dare to ask, stupid or clever, to-the-point questions. Or things that you would never have thought of. If you dare to ask, you are half way through success. I remember when I went to school, teachers seemed to love kids who did not ask too many questions which could be interpreted as studious and obedient. It is core to our culture where we are taught to obey the adults. The authority of the adults/seniors is never to be questioned. And, we are so used to the spoon-feeding type of education. People hardly dare to speak up. The same phenomenon went through university education as well.

The real shock came when you work for a very American organization where they expect you to actively participate no matter what. It is an experience that I will never forget. Previously I worked with a lot of Americans, I did encounter cultural shock at the very beginning, trying to adjust to an entirely different working culture. For someone as outgoing and talkative as I was, speaking up spontaneously in a business environment was not a piece of bread for me surprisingly. Reason being is that working with Hong Kong Chinese, a lot of time, bosses are always intimidated by very daring or spontaneous staff. There is certain truth to the fact that some incapable Managers dare not hire someone who outweighs them in qualifications or work experience. Yet as a matter of survival as well as having the need to fit in, I soon then adjusted myself and spoke up as much as I could and regularly jumped in with new ideas or thoughts which was a way of getting yourself involved and indulge deeply and whole-heartedly into whatever you did.

As true as it seems, silence is not always ‘golden’.

Written on 21 August 2005